Sometimes the memories are worth the pain.
The loneliness won't leave me alone.
How can you understand me when I can't understand myself?
I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.
You think you want to die, but in reality, you just want to be saved.
Every so often, we long to steal to a land of what might have been, but that doesn’t soften the ache we feel, when [[ reality sets back in ... Don’t wish, don’t start;; ]] Wishing only wounds the heart. </3
The minute you think of giving up, think of the reason why you held on for so long.
I’d give anything to leave this place.
You think you want to die, but in reality you just want to be saved.
Sometimes I think about the past and I fall apart inside.
The only places where I feel absolutely safe are either in bed with fresh, white sheets and pillows surrounding my head or in water. Like on the bottom of a swimming pool. Alone. Weightless. Peaceful. Nobody talking. Nobody pretending. Just being. Those are the only two places. Everywhere else I get smacked in the face with arrogance, ignorance, shallowness. They knock me down and leave me bleeding on the floor.
“Are you really okay?” I am acting like I am okay. Please don’t interrupt my performance.
Those minutes where I am alone, just me and my pillow, I think. A lot. I think about everything, anything. It varies from “What am I doing with my life?” to “Did I have homework?” The room is so silent, but my mind is so loud. It drives me crazy because the things I would never think about, I think about. Sometimes, I hate it because it brings up things I rather never think about again. The split second before sleep is the most active second of my life.
I myself and made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions
I desire the things which will destroy me in the end.
Sometimes you just have to hold your head up high, blink away the tears, and say good-bye.
It's the loneliest feeling in the world - to find yourself standing up when everyone else is sitting down. To have everybody look at you and say, "What’s the matter with her?" I know what it feels like. Walking down an empty street, listening to the sound of your own footsteps. Shutters closed, blinds drawn, doors locked against you. And you aren't sure whether you're walking toward something, or if you're just walking away.
I'm waiting for the day when my tears will run dry.
Sometimes when you hurt so much and you don't know why, it's hard to breathe.
Her eyes scream the saddest apology the world has ever heard.
Oh, the scars on her wrist? Don't worry, she says they're just a reminder of how many times you broke her heart. <|3
It's hard to believe I actually sat on the bathroom floor with my wrists bleeding for hours.
Suicide is not the love of death, but it's the fear of living.
We’re the kids who feel like dead ends.
Force our smiles, baby, half dead. From comparing myself to everyone else around me.
“Funny when you’re dead how people start listening.”
Stop the world, I wanna get off.
I enjoy life. I think I’ll enjoy death even more.
And she says she doesn’t care anymore, but the look in her eyes and the sound of her voice tells a different story. <|3
Even if it kills me, I'm going to smile.
& I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare.
A smile can hide a thousand tears.
She says she's okay, but underneath her broken smile is her broken heart.
I'm a daughter hiding my depression. I'm a sister making a good impression. I'm the girl sitting next to you. I'm the one asking you to care. I'm your best friend hoping you'll be there.
They say you were given this life because you were strong enough to live it. What if you're not? What if you can't take it anymore? What if you don't want to deal with the pain anymore? What if your emotions are too much to bear? What do you do then?
Crying all night keeps me from the nightmares but sleep keeps me away from the pain.
It actually was my fault, but I blame you because I can't accept that I ruined the best thing I had in my life single handedly.
My world stopped spinning and tumbled downwards into the dark endlessness of space.
The happy joyful bounce from her stride faded away as she realized something was wrong.
I know this night is always going to come back and visit me in my dreams and every time I close my eyes. I just know it. <|3
It's getting harder to breathe. How could you do this to me. I remember my old sweats and tee.
Life is... a series of disappointments... broken only... by dark spells of depression.
Open your eyes and see into the darkness of my soul.
I've got nothing to lose because I already lost it all.
I'm never safe, not even in my own skin.
Sometimes, when I say "oh, I'm fine." I want you to look into my eyes and say "tell the truth."
& she will fool everyone with her fake smile and pretend laugh.
And her eyes spill the truth she's been dying to hide.
Sanctuary: A small safe place in a troubled world.
I'm going to smile and make you think I'm happy. I'm going to laugh so you don't see me cry. And even if it kills me, I'm going to smile.
Smile. It's easier than explaining why you're sad.
I never wanted to be the girl who cries herself to sleep.
Maybe you will hear my silence.
You can't see I'm hurting. You're too blind to notice my pain. It feels like everyone's sitting in sunshine, while I'm drowning in rain.